12/09/2013
It’s so easy to say things like “it will never happen to me”. You might have thought that your loved one could never become an addict or alcoholic, yet here you are reading this.
Addiction is a chronic, incurable brain disease that will get worse the longer it’s left untreated. It’s like a balloon – the more air you put into it, the bigger it gets until it eventually bursts.
Understanding that your loved one has an addiction problem is the first step to recovery for the addict & everyone affected by it. It won’t be easy but the sooner you get them into treatment, the better.
In this article, we’ll discuss the 5 stages of acceptance of an addiction problem that parents with addicts commonly go through. Here’s what you can expect.
Stage 1 – Denial
It’s normal for any parent to deny that their loved one has an addiction problem. It’s just so hard to believe that this is happening to the child you brought up.
Let’s make an example. You found drug or alcohol paraphernalia in your loved ones room or clothing & when you ask them what they’re doing with it, they give you some feeble explanation. Even though you find it hard to believe, you give them the benefit of the doubt for because of the denial you feel.
The more you deny that your loved one has a drug or alcohol problem despite seeing all the facts in front of you, the worse will things become.
Stage 2 – Anger
Imagine getting a phone call from the local police station, telling you that your addicted son has been arrested for being in possession of drugs. How angry would you be?
All the high hopes & dreams you had for your child has for the time being gone out the window. Now you’re angry at your child, the dealers & anyone else associated to their addiction.
Instead, use your anger in the right manner. Alcoholics Anonymous (AA) uses a saying that goes like this: “Hate the addiction, not the addict”. Your loved one will do anything to feed their addiction, even if they can see the damage it’s causing. They are simply not in the right state of mind to make good decisions.
Start by setting new boundaries in your household and make sure that you stick by them. It’s perfectly normal to feel angry but make sure that you use it as a method to get your loved one to recover, even if you have to force them into rehab.
Stage 3 – Grief
It’s very sad to accept that your loved one has an addiction problem. I mean, that’s not how you raised them?
You want what’s best for them but their addiction is damaging these hopes day by day.
Stage 4 – Bargaining
Bargaining & denial are like peas in a pod. Where one goes, the other is sure to follow.
Many parents offer their addicted loved ones things such as money & cosiness in the hope that they will turn over a new leaf & quit drugs or alcohol.
In actual fact by doing this, you’re allowing their addiction to continue. They will never stop using drugs or alcohol if you continue doing these things for them because it’s all too easy for them.
Until you stamp down your authority & explain to them that you’re not going to sit back & allow their addiction to continue, things will continue to get worse.
Stage 5 – Acceptance
Accepting your loved one’s addiction problem is the only way forward. They made a decision & now they have to deal with the consequences. That’s how life works.
There’s no reason why your loved one cannot live happily & successfully again but in order to achieve that, you have to know how you can help them.
The best & safest way to treat addiction is to get professional help inside a drug or alcohol rehab centre where they’ll receive medical care, counselling & therapy.
We can provide you with immediate admission into the best private addiction treatment centres in South Africa, the United Kingdom & Thailand. Call us now & let one of our qualified counsellors provide you with free, expert advice.